I changed...

My blog again. I saw this template on another blog, and it reminded me of chocolate. It just looks too yummy to me, but also a little Zen. It's like eating a pound of chocolate, then having a nap. Which I could totally do right now.

Actually I don't know if a pound would do it for me right now, but I could give it a go... Nah. One pound of chocolate translates to 5.3265045 pounds more of butt fat, roughly. I am doing swell, pardon the pun, in the butt fat department. I have been stress eating. :(

Anyone who has had a problem with weight can understand what I am talking about, but I am sure there are a few out there that are thinking, "Now, wait a minute... You are already down in the dumps, why would you want to binge and then be even more depressed after popping the buttons off the only pair of shorts that fit you anymore?"

Good question. I don't have much of an answer except that it has been scientifically proven that some foods will actually cause the increased production of Serotonin, therefore causing a feeling of well being after ingestion. A lot of these foods are rich in carbs, and many of them are high in fat.
So, even though you might experience that mini high, unfortunately most of those calories and fat grams are going straight to your fat cells. Isn't that fabulous?

By the way, you might be asking yourself, "What stress?"
and, "Why did I just ask that? Should I keep reading, because surely she is going to tell me..."
We have had our money leaching house on the market for almost 4 weeks and have had a whopping 4 people come through. At our open house last Saturday, we had one. We know it's because of the money pit called our bathroom, and have had a fine gentleman tell us it is going to cost us another $350 to put a texture on the walls to disguise our less than adequate sanding job.
So let's see, over the last 5 years, on our bathroom alone we have literally flush how much money down the drain?

shower/tub plumbing, new tile in shower, partial replacement of tub drainage pipes- 1500
new sheetrock/taping/mudding- 400
new medicine cabinet, sink, vanity, light fixture (+ supplies and tools)- 475

Now add 350 and the grand total comes to $2725. I guess in the long run, the work had to be done, and another 350 is just a small price to pay to sell this unloving, unforgiving hunk of brick... Pair that with the owners of the house that we made an offer on, well lets just say that we are positive that we are the only dingalings that have shown any interest at all. They have decided to make things very difficult for us by demanding an inspection right away. By doing this, we could be out of $275 if they accept another offer. They also were demanding that we start the loan process, so that it would be ready when we sell our house. Again shelling out money for closing costs and title for something that may fall through. Our lender wrote them a letter stating that there was no way this was going to happen, after they refused to take our word for it. Finally their agent told them it would be in their best interest to bide their time until our contract expired on August 24th (meaning that we will not have sold our house by then), in which case we would get our earnest money back, and our contract would be null and void.

I almost would rather just do that and find another house. I think though, that our contract might expire, they will have no other buyers lined up. We will find another house, and they will be knocking our door down, begging us to reconsider. We might, but it's going to cost them another 7-10 grand. I don't like mind games, and all the drama is really wearing on me. I deserve a little compensation for my trauma, don't I?

Where's the chocolate...

Anyway, if you are interested in reading more on serotonin/food relationship, here are a few interesting and informative articles for you:
Why some foods make you feel good...
Serotonin and foods?
Chocolate
Researchers say chocolate triggers feel-good chemicals
FOODS FOR SLEEP

If you would like to do your own research, just Google serotonin and food.

Butt, butt, butt...

Emma is trying her hardest to talk, and we are trying our hardest to interpret. Her vocabulary consists of:
up
eht- eat
weh- wet
out- ouch
maht- mouth
eye
blah- yuck
bah bah- momma
dada
adah, ahhh, badah- Anna
upps- oops
what?
poop
poot- fart
pepe- peepee
hi!
uh-puhbuh - up above (the world so high)
spy- spider
roofroof- dog
meow, dat, key-key- cat
dense- dance
Pooh bah- Pooh bear

Ok, here is where it starts to get tricky...

butt- foot, milk, shoe, cat, dog, book, bread, five (for "give me 5"), head, kiss, shirt, bird, button, butterfly and butt

Usually we have to figure out what she is pointing at, and go through all of the possibilities. We know for sure when she wants milk, because she does the ASL sign. Other than that, it's a crap shoot. Oh, and she is doing this adorable thing where she gives her baby doll a kiss by loudly saying "mmmmmmm-muah". Also, she is giving the best hugs, and rubs the back of your head or neck while holding on tightly.

Anna... is just being Anna. Still 5 going on 35, testing the sassiness boundaries every day. She is so cat like, it's not funny. It's all scratching and hissing, but when she wants affection it is so nice. She can be quite the snuggle bunny when she wants to be.

Anywhooo...Speaking of butts... I am having such a struggle right now. I am so sick and tired of people being either passive-aggressive or just plain rude. If you have a problem with me, please, by all means talk to me about it. Don't sit there and glower at me, make snide or rude comments, or ignore me. I drives me nuts! I had 18 years of that with my mother, with a little insanity tossed into the mix. My mother would go days without talking to me, never giving me the benefit of actually telling me what mistake I had made. Later I would find out, usually at 2 o'clock in the morning, what I had done wrong. Sometimes it would be when I least expected, preceded by a large whack with a hair brush to the back of the head.

Maybe all I want is a little R E S P E C T. The Bible says that I need to forgive, turn the other cheek, above all else love.

I don't want to.

I have had a lifetime of being walked all on. I feel that when I sit quietly and say nothing, I am inviting more rudeness and abuse.It's as if I am saying, "Hey, look at me! Come on over and kick me as hard as you can, because I am just going to sit her with a smile on my face and take it."

Why? Why do I have to be the nice one, all the time? Why do I have to smile on the outside and feel miserable in the inside?
Why is this so hard for me?

The only thing that I can think of is that my walk isn't where it should be, and that I can't move forward until I deal with this. God is keeping pretty quiet about the whole thing, and I think it has something to do with the fact that I have all the answers from Him that I need, but I refuse to acknowledge them.

I told John that all I am capable of right now is walking away. When things get rough and I am starting to get steamed, I am just going to get up and remove myself from the situation, therefore reducing the risk of an explosion. Hopefully once I get the hang of this, I can gradually stick around and keep my big yap shut. Yeah, that's the ticket. But for now , I feel a little bit like this. I just want to climb a tree.

Life Lessons, anyone?

I love those commercials on the TLC channel that talk about life lessons, they really crack me up. Have you guys seen those?

"Merlot and email do not mix."

Anyway, I was thinking as I was putting my freshly laundered bras away about a mishap I had at a family wedding, which led to #1 on my list of 10 Life Lessons:

1· Never wear a new bra to a social function, always test drive it a few days before. You never know when the girls will decide to Escape From Alacatraz and head south.

2· If you find something you can't live without on sale, buy it. Chances are when you come back later in the week it will be gone. You can always return it later if you change you mind.

3· Never leave your game on pause without saving first. Toddlers love lights and buttons.

4· Speaking of kids- if you are hungry make twice the amount because your kids are going to want what you are eating, even though they just finished eating. The grilled cheese is always cheesier on the other side of the fence.

5· Sharp and pointy toys such as blocks are best appreciated by all in the kids room. Never let them in the family room because they like to sneak up on adults at night and bite them on the foot.

6· Leave the home improvement to the professionals. Hiring help for work beyond your expertise is generally not frowned upon, unless you enjoy doing the same project over and over until you get really good at it from all the practice. Or you decide the project is completed because you just don't care anymore.

7· Grilling + bacon = a beautiful and glorious grill fire that will eventually go out once the 3 lbs of bacon fat has burned off.

8· Charred bacon WILL scorch grass on contact.

9· When trying a new migraine medicine before bed, make sure you are wearing a decent bra and nightgown. Also, leg shaving is not necessary, but EMT's do appreciate this. EKG electrodes stick better on clean shaven legs.

10· Benadryl chewable tablets are a wonderful medicine to keep on hand, you never know when you will have an allergic reaction. See #9


Uh, thank ya, than yuh ver mush.

Anyone else feel like sharing?