Friday, January 08, 2010

If I had a nickel...

I was at work last week telling one of my fabulous coworkers about what my girls have been up to- which, yes, would be trouble...thank you for asking- and she said, "Oh my God Mary, and you're having another one? You are so screwed."

After laughing for about 2 minutes , utterly and completely without rancor and irony, I wiped the tears from my eyes and simply replied, "Yes, oh God yes, this I know."

I am hoping for a Christ-like child if you want to know. Not that my girls aren't fun and entertaining but I have on occasion looked intently at their scalps to have the MISU ask what I was doing. I would reply with a saintly smile that I was looking for the "the mark of the beast", or the evil triple digit.

I would love it if God would somehow deem it necessary and right for me to have a child full of sweetness and light... and to be nothing like me. I already have 2 of those. I had thought for sure He had broken the mold, burned it, and then scattered the ashes to all corners of this little rock we live on. It's a nice thought anyway.

And if I cannot have a Christ-like child, dear Lord, if you should see fit to go with my alternate option... Please make my baby (if it's a boy) in Guy Fieri's image. You know... light hearted, easy going and later in life not ashamed to feed his momma. I'm just saying.

To be sure, I will say again that I have no one else to blame. I wouldn't say I would change my girls per se, just maybe "take a little off the sides". But they are who they are and I love them despite my ability to see in them at times all the little things that irk me about myself LOL! Yes, I have taught them well. ;)


Not So Anonymous Michelle said...

You still crack me up, I just love how you write! Seriously! I hope you get that baby of your dreams...same for me actually! haha!

Mert said...

I hope we both get the babies of our dreams... you just better not get mine LMAO! Just kidding!!! ;) But seriously LOL!

I'm glad I can still crack you up Shell :D

meleah rebeccah said...

Well, I hope your new baby is the most perfectly healthy baby ever!

Holly Schwendiman said...

Likely, you'll get a boy just to throw you out of any current comfort zones. Nothing like changing the rules of engagement to keep life interesting, and if it's better if you're already planning for a girl. You know, no matter how you slice it your kids are lucky ducks to have you as parents. :) Bring on the chaos, I say.