There is a new addiction out there in lala land... and it's name is CRACKBOX! Signs and symptoms of CRACKBOX addiction may include (but are not limited to) :
- Sitting for hours staring at a television screen with a controller in hand- meanwhile the kids toilet paper the house, shave the cat and light each other on fire.
- Dinner turns cold and possibly goes uneaten.
- The CRACKBOX-head eats 1.45 bowls of cereal 6 hours after dinner was thrown into the trash.
- Any interruptions is game play is responded to with a "Huh?", but the CRACKBOX-head's glazed eyes never leave the screen.
- Spending hours playing online and talking to some guy in Jersey named XXX_Bonecrusher_XXX.
- All conversations with the CRACKBOX-head during brief periods of rest (for gamer's thumb) lead back to playing the game.
1. The "My wife still loves me enough to let me play, as long as I spend some time with the kids" Patch. For size #1, apply to shoulder, gluteus, or abdomen with a firm slap.
2. And The "I've forgotten my kid's names, and my wife won't sleep with me anymore" Super Patch. For size #2, apply directly to forehead, tack in pace with the heel of your husband's work shoe as needed.
Side effects* may include: swelling and tenderness to the shoulder, buttocks or abdomen; redness and tenderness to the forehead, and brief loss of consciousness.
*Almost Somewhat Positive and it's author are not liable or responsible for any side effects should you wish to use this product.