Thursday, September 20, 2007

TYSVM, miss snarky pants.

So, as you saw from my previous post I bought me some al-kee-hawl. I like to have the occasional drink but I'm no connoisseur, and though I hate to admit it... I have a fruit fly problem. Yes, the vurry vurrrrry fine 6 dollah wine I bought was actually for the pests in my house.

I'm very hospitable, what can I tell you.

BUT I digress.

Six dollar wine. Right. I ran into the store to get a few things like fruit (no, not for the fruit flies... I have to draw the line somewhere), milk, stuff to make homemade cinny rolls, and yup, you guessed it 6 dollah muscato. I tried to pick something that both the fruit flies and I would like.

I head up to the register and totally like this girl? She was like totally bumming? and was like devastated that I actually would ask her to work? Totally. Like. Oh. Mah. Gah.

"Do you need my ID?" I asked politely, despite the fact that Little Missy Poopy Pants was put out. She curled her upper lip slightly while flaring one nostril, while giving me the once over,"Um. No. I don't think so."

"Actually most places want to swipe your ID when you buy alcohol."

"Well, we are supposed to but you're obviously old enough to buy it."

"Yessss, " I say coolly while pointing to the extinguished distinguished looking racing stripes I have going on at my temples, "Yes, I know."

"What, are you like in your 30's?"

"Yes. 37." Almost 38, I smiled as I thought about how 20 years will fly by in a blink. One day she will be me and she doesn't even know it. I kept that little tidbit to myself though. Though she may have tried to ruin a moment in my life, I chose to let her remain in Neverland for her moment. One day she will be in my shoes, and one day some cheerleader turned cashier will wait on her and remind her how old she looks. And she will probably need that wine as much as I did right then. :)

And maybe on that day, she will return the favor- pay it forward if you will- and give that cashier a little grace because little cheerleader doesn't know any better.

Now 'scuse me... The fruit flies and I need a refill. :)


Mommy2JL said...

LoL Great post!
I never would have guessed you were in your late 30's (although given that I've never met you and I've only ever seen your little profile picture, what would I know? lol)
It doesn't matter if you're young in years as long as you're young at heart.
And a bottle of wine every now and again doesn't hurt either.


I could say that I'm only 21, and what would I know anyways, but I tell you.. there are some days I feel older than my parents.

Life ages you faster than your years do.

Daddy Forever said...

It's a good thing she wasn't a waitress. No tip for her!

Theresa said...

Ignorance is bliss, as they always say; you were just too kind not to enlighten her. You must have the world's happiest fruit flies. At my house they attack the Modena vinegar, and we keep the wine for ourselves.

Maggie said...

Are you my twin?? LOL.

When did we get so old. I remember trying to get into places with my future ex sister in laws ID at 18 just wishing I was 21. and now.... Nobody asks me either. I think I look 40.

Mert said...

Mommy 2JL, I agree... age is a state of mind. I always tell people that I', almost 38, but humor wise I'm still about 12 LOL!

Daddy Forever, very true. NO TIPS FOR YOU!

Theresa, great tip about the vinegar. So far the fruit flies do not like my choice in wine ;)

Maggie, it sux to be us , huh? Oh well, at least I still have a decent rack ROFL!

Priscilla Palmer said...

You have been tagged for The Personal Development List. I would love for you to participate.

Dana said...

Oh how I remember being that girl! I don't know what happened but somewhere along the way, I blinked and immediately started to look old.

Connie said...

I work for 911, and occasionally I will get a clerk at a convenience store call because someone walked out with beer. While getting a description of a suspect, I ask "how old did he look?" More than once, I've heard "Oh he looked really old! like 30!" *sigh*

~Virginia~ said...

I don't understand the audacity that some people have--you're better than I am...I would said something really rude back. Maybe the Patience Gene is something that kicks in once you have kids because right now, I tolerate very little crap. I aspire to have your optimism! :)

Not So Anonymous Michelle said...

Some people's children! Geez! I give you credit for being so good about it, I would have wanted to say something worse than you did...although I'm pretty polite and think those things more than I actually say them.

I don't even get carded anymore and I'm 29, I must look old enough or maybe it's because I have my daughter with me and hubby that is older...who knows.

Ash said...

Tom works in a liqour store and cards EVERYONE. I asked him why one time and he said the older women(way way older then you my dear) love him for it. I guess it's true stuff.

JAM said...

Our daughters are 19 and 21, but we still buy lots of candy and kiddie items to put in their Christmas stockings. This past year, we bought them the good stuff, and while the cashier at walmart rang up the stuff, two by two, she said, "Looks like your grandkids are getting lots of candy this year."

Good thing I'm a laid back guy. I thought it was funny and laughed. Luckily for check-out-girl, she had directed this remark directly at me, and not Lovely Wife.

Your wine buying reminds me of a favorite old Sanford and Son episode. Lamont had taken Fred into a bar and bought them eadh a drink. Fred asked Lamont how much each drink had cost. Lamont told him $3. Fred yelled, "THREE DOLLARS! I COULD HAVE BOUGHT A HALF A CASE OF MUSCATEL FOR $3!"

Just thought I'd share.

kailani said...

When I was younger I used to get insulted whenever I was carded. Now I'm insulted when I not. LOL!

Karen Lynch-Live the Power said...

ha ha Mary I am older than you!!!
I am 46 and by damn I haven't been carded even one time since I was 41!! Forty one!! (actually that makes me happy, happy, that's why I repeat it!!hehe)
and that little cheerleader turned cashier will be 46 before she knows it!! Life goes on.....

Hot Grandma said...

As I'm sure you know customer service is a thing of the past!As I was pulling away from the pump at my local gas station a young hispanic man almost hit my brand new car. He flipped me the bird and called me several names that curled my hair. As I was leaving I was behind him and he would go 2 feet and stop all the way around the gas station. So finally in frustration I threw my hands up as to say what is the problem. He then got out of his car and proceeded to call me all sorts of horrible names. So I rolled my window down and asked him if he really wanted to beat up a 100 pound grandmother. He told me to get the f__k out of my car. I was really scared, but out of the corner of my eye I could see 4 large construction workers heading in my direction. All the while the guy was still calling me all kinds of names. And all i could think of was God please help me. So I said to him you know you are never gonna get to heaven acting like that. He kept up the profanity working himself up into a real tissy. I kept repeating to him God Bless You Sir, God Bless you Sir, God will hopefully bless you but you really need to loose the potty mouth. After about my 6th God Bless You he gave up and moved his car so I could get out. But the best part was the thumbs up and the resounding sound of applause from the rest of the people in the station. Beleive me I was about to mess my own drawers after that one. He was a huge guy and if he would of attacked me I proably wouldn't be writing this right now. But I did ask God what to do and there it was!!!